Broken Hearted

Can a broken heart be mended? Can we survive having our hearts stomped on by another and then recover to love again? Yes, I know this sounds a tad bit melodramatic but really can we love someone else fully after we have been hurt in the past? And is it easier for men or women to get over 'love gone bad'?

My heart was truly broken for the first time circa 1987, when I realized that Michael Jackson would never be mine forever. I had to cheer myself up by listening to 'Bad' over and over again. Yes folks, I, like all kids of the 80s, was in looove with Michael. Anyway, I got over him and moved on to Denzel Washington.

Now let's be serious. Let's say you fell madly and truly in love with someone for the first time in your life. I am talking about true love, not giddy lust or anything like that. You believe that this person is your soul mate and you are prepared to spend the rest of your life with them. One day out of the blue, your 'soul mate' says that he/she has had enough and they want out of the relationship or you catch him/her cheating. Can your heart ever be mended? Can you fully love again and be open with another person without thinking about what happened in the past?

I asked a couple of friends about this recently and they all agreed that a broken heart in the past would almost always affect relationships in the future. It has been said that 'players' (guys or girls) who now go around breaking hearts, were once broken hearted themselves. They got hurt by their true loves and are now taking revenge. Yes I know I am getting melodramatic again but there is some truth to it. If your girl or guy deceives you in some way, it will be harder to trust again in a new relationship. You will, like it or not, judge your new love by the actions of your old one.

So how do we mend a broken heart so that we can love again fully with putting up all of the barriers and walls around our hearts? We have to remember that this is life. You win some you lose some. From every relationship we learn a lot about our selves and about others. We learn what to do and what not to do in a relationship. We also have to realize that everyone is different, that each relationship is different and we can not blame or judge someone based on another person's actions.

My male friends were saying that women handle break ups much worse than men do. I beg to differ! I think that both men and women can suffer equally from a broken heart. Sometimes some men just have a better way of hiding it and keeping it all in. Men, don't be afraid to cry and let it all out!

As I get older (yes I know that I am only 26), I truly believe that everything happens for a reason. If someone breaks your heart, cheats on you or leaves you, then it is for the best. At least they are now out of your way and out of your life so that you can meet someone else who is better for you. Anyhoo enough of this depressing stuff. This is a brand new year and I can not wait to see what happens next in my love life. Stay tuned…