Wedding Bliss

Before I even start anything, let me just clarify one thing—no, I am not getting married. I know how the St Lucian grapevine works. Someone sees the title of this article and before even reading the piece a cousin in Brooklyn is telling all Looshans up there how they hear Esther Lee getting married. Then my mother will get a whole-ton a calls, everyone wanting to know who’s the lucky man. Then my mother will be calling me to find out how come folks in Brooklyn know I’m getting hitched and she doesn’t! Yes, it has happened before!
So anyway, I recently attended a wedding at a local hotel for a feature in Tropical Traveller. I had planned to interview the couple and observe the ceremony. The bride and groom seemed so in love. Both were teary eyed during the exchange of vows and couldn’t take their eyes off each other. Later I heard how the newly married man had fallen in love with his bride the day he met her. Awww! How sweet is that?
While watching the happy couple promise to love each other for life, I couldn’t help but feel a little pang of jealousy, wishing that one day I would experience the same thing. But then I really don't know when or if I could ever get married. Yes, just like most young women, I sometimes dream about walking down the aisle in my Vera Wang wedding dress to meet my groom at the altar. But this whole marriage thing is just not that important to me right now. While some of my schoolmates are now married, running a household and having babies, I remain very satisfied putting my energy into my career and other activities I enjoy.
My puppy Coco is trouble enough to care for and I can't imagine having a husband and kids. Heck, I still live with my Mama! I choose to be a bit selfish with my life and time right now.Even when I get older, I wonder if marriage will be that important or necessary. With the divorce rate so high, saying ‘I do’ is a real risk. Why can’t I just be like Oprah? She and Stedman have been together forever and choose not to take that all-important trip down the aisle. I could just have a boyfriend or boyfriends. Why not? I know that marriage purists are wondering what’s wrong with me but that’s how I feel right now; ten years down the line, I may feel differently.
Lately, I have been thinking about kids as well. I really do not know if I want any. I recently interviewed a very successful magazine publisher who’s been married for several years and they’ve decided not to have kids. Going against all pressure from family and friends, this woman admitted that her work was her baby and that she was just too busy and happy with her life to fit kids in. I totally admired her for being so honest because a lot of women feel pressured to follow the ideal family picture. I totally understood her.
I spoke to my wise mother recently about my to- have-children-or-not dilemma and she spoke of the joys of motherhood. But hey, this is life and you never know what may happen. Come find me in five years and I may just be barefoot and pregnant, cooking in some man's kitchen!